Unanswered prayer, What is Your Heart Motive?

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“You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures.”
—James 4:3

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Praying according to the will of God was once very puzzling to me. I used to believe there was a precise formula for prayer that had to be followed perfectly in order to receive an answer.

However, the verse above reveals something deeper. Could asking “amiss” be connected to praying with the wrong motives?

James 4:3 explains that some people ask and do not receive because they intend to use what they receive solely for their own pleasures. This suggests that prayer involves more than the words we speak. God also sees the desires, intentions, and motives within our hearts.

For example, suppose you desire wealth and ask God to prosper you abundantly. It is wise to examine why you want that prosperity. Is it so that you can provide for your family, support worthy causes, create opportunities, and become a blessing to others? Or is the desire driven mainly by pride, comparison, status, and personal indulgence?

The desire for prosperity is not automatically wrong. However, our motives influence the way we would use the blessing we are requesting.

The same principle can apply to the desire for marriage. Perhaps someone longs to be married, but that desire is driven mainly by lust, loneliness, social pressure, or the need to possess another person. Marriage requires love, faithfulness, patience, sacrifice, and responsibility. A person who desires only the excitement of attraction may not yet be prepared to care for another person’s heart.

These are just a few things to consider when we are waiting for answers to prayer.

Sometimes the waiting period gives us an opportunity to examine our hearts. Are we asking from a place of love, wisdom, service, and purpose? Or are we asking from pride, envy, fear, or selfish ambition?

God is not merely concerned with giving us what we want. He also cares about who we are becoming and how we will handle what we receive.

So, as we pray, let us invite God to purify our motives and align our desires with His wisdom. We can ask Him not only to answer our prayers, but also to prepare our hearts for the answers.

Before asking, “Why has this prayer not been answered?” it may be helpful to ask, “What is motivating this prayer, and what would I do with the blessing if it came?”